Setting the Scene
At nearly ten years old, Te Mihi Potae became one of the first matches in Rotorua’s Big Brothers Big Sisters programme. It was an exciting time—his match with David Remmerswaal even made it into the newspaper, a snapshot of two kids with wild hair, ready to embark on a new journey together.
Te Mihi vividly remembers his induction interview with Darryl, where he was asked what he wanted to do. His answer? "Zoom in on a computer so far that you can see all of the pixels." That moment set the tone for a match built on curiosity, creativity, and shared adventures.
At the time, Te Mihi faced the challenge of growing up without a father figure. Adopted at birth and raised by two wonderful mothers, he had a loving home but lacked a consistent male role model. Having David as a Big Brother provided that missing piece—someone to talk to about life, guy things, and the journey ahead.
First Impressions & Building the Relationship
When Te Mihi first met David, nervous excitement filled the air. The meeting took place at his house, with Darryl making the introduction. It was a new chapter, filled with possibilities, but also the uncertainty that comes with meeting someone new.
Trust between them didn’t hinge on one defining moment; rather, it was built steadily over time. From the very beginning, Te Mihi felt comfortable being himself around David. That foundation of trust allowed them to form a strong bond, one that would last nearly a decade.
Memorable Moments
Some of Te Mihi’s favourite memories with David include mountain biking in the rain, geocaching, and Saturday mornings at the market—where David introduced him to island-style fried bread donuts with jam. They were simple, fun moments that meant the world to a young boy looking for connection.
One particularly special experience was in Year 9, when Te Mihi wrote a script for a short film. His English teacher encouraged him to enter a national competition, and he created "Teeth," a horror story about kids discovering a sinister secret about the Tooth Fairy. David and his friend, Simone, even acted in the film. Though the project was never completed, Te Mihi still thinks about rewriting and finishing it one day.
David’s support went beyond just fun outings. When Te Mihi participated in a pitch night, similar to Toastmasters, he was overwhelmed by nerves. As the youngest participant, surrounded by older, more experienced people, he felt out of place. But David was right there, reassuring him and calming him down, making sure he felt supported.
Their connection continued even after their official match ended. Last year, as Te Mihi debated his future, he caught up with David to discuss potential career paths. David’s advice was simple but profound: “Follow your passion. Don’t just pick a career for the money.” That conversation reinforced Te Mihi’s decision to pursue acting at Toi Whakaari: New Zealand Drama School in Wellington—one of only 22 students accepted into the prestigious first-year programme.
Personal Growth & Impact
Having a mentor like David made a lasting impact on Te Mihi’s life. While his parents always supported him, hearing encouragement from a male role model had a different weight. David’s influence helped shape his confidence, creativity, and willingness to chase his dreams.
Through their years together, David provided the freedom for Te Mihi to be himself, to lead their adventures, and to make decisions that felt right for him. That sense of autonomy helped him grow into the person he is today.
Emotional & Lasting Impact
If Te Mihi had to describe David in just a few words, he’d say:
Creative
Inspirational
Selfless
Empathetic
Would he be where he is today without David’s support? “I don’t think so,” he admits. David’s mentorship provided a guiding presence that shaped his outlook on life, pushing him to embrace his creativity and ambition.
Though their official match ended in 2022, they still keep in touch. Their relationship has evolved, but the impact remains strong.
Looking Forward & Paying It Forward
If he could say one thing to David today, it would be: “Thank you so much. I owe him a lot. He has done so much for me, and I’m really grateful.”
And now, Te Mihi wants to pass that gift on. After finishing his studies, he plans to become a Big Brother himself, ensuring another young person gets the same life-changing experience he did.
To anyone considering getting a mentor, his advice is simple: Just do it. It’s so much fun, and you won’t regret it. Those nerves you feel at first? They disappear in no time.
David’s impact on Te Mihi’s life is a testament to the power of mentorship—proof that showing up, listening, and sharing experiences can change someone’s life forever.
"A Decade of Difference: The Journey of a Mentor and Mentee"
In the Heart of the Mentor:
Ten years ago, a young boy named Jordan, shy and unsure on his first two-wheeler, entered Tim's life through Big Brothers Big Sisters. Tim recalls, "He was this lively kid, all energy and missing front teeth, barely reaching my waist. Now, he's almost my height, shaving, and learning to drive!" This journey wasn't just about fun activities; it was about witnessing Jordan's incredible transformation - from a reticent seven-year-old to a confident, community-involved teenager. "It's the pebble effect," Tim says, "The ripples of our time together have reshaped his life, and surprisingly, mine too."
Through the Eyes of the Mentee:
Jordan's perspective sheds light on his initial hesitation and the ensuing transformation. "I was scared, unsure about trusting Tim. But now, he's my best mate." With Tim's support, Jordan navigated challenging behaviours and academic struggles. "He helped me find my footing - in school, in Scouts, even in photography. I've become a leader, thanks to him."
The Parent's Viewpoint:
As a single mother, Jordan's mom sought a consistent male role model for her son. "Tim was more than just a mentor; he brought joy, stability, and adventure into Jordan's life." She credits Tim with helping the family through their darkest times, including the loss of Jordan's father. "He's become a part of our family, a beacon of support and kindness."
The Coordinator's Insight:
Reflecting on this match, the BBBS coordinator highlights the mutual respect and generosity that defines Tim and Jordan's relationship. "It's a bond that transcends our program, a connection that will last a lifetime."
In Conclusion:
This story isn't just about a decade-long mentorship. It's a testament to the transformative power of dedicated mentoring. It's about how a little guidance can turn into a lifelong bond, reshaping lives and hearts along the way. As Jordan embarks on new adventures, one thing remains certain: the ripples of this relationship will continue to spread, touching lives far beyond their own.
Drew Ewan
National CEO
drew.ewan@bbbs.nz
Chelsea Routhan
National Operations Director
Matthew Button
National Practice Manager
Cushla Duncan
National Communications Manager